A Time to Every Purpose

A word of encouragement to home school moms or anyone in need of support.....

I recently watched a movie that caused me to reflect on the goals of our lives, the unheralded duties and responsibilities, the unending tasks and the sometimes misunderstood reactions to life’s happenings.

I’m not much of a movie watcher, but this feature filled my thoughts for some time. And the bottom line, I think, is that , as prudent Solomon stated in Ecclesiastes, “To everything there is a season and a time to every purpose under heaven.”

One of the closing lines of the movie was the recitation of a dream. The character stated he had dreamed of flying--flying so far into the heavens that he reached where the blue met the black. From there he could see that everything that happens in life is for a good reason. Perspective.

So I thought about the stick-to-it-tiveness required by home schooling parents. During those early years of instruction there is generally a great deal of enthusiasm and zest for learning, by both parent and child. As the years progress and the learning becomes more difficult, the hormones more prevalent, and the world’s siren call more strident, it can become a sheer act of courage and discipline to continue. But I believe, continue we must. Perspective.

For the home schooling mom there can be many things that lure her away from her primary tasks. Most are good activities, useful projects, and beneficial causes. But if God has called you to home school you must consider that maybe this is not the season of your life for the extraneous.

Women have been sold a lie, straight from the Pit, that they must be allowed to ‘do their own thing’, ‘look out for number one’, ‘take care of themselves first’, and a host of other selfish eulogizes. That’s not to say that there isn’t a time to draw away and rest. Even our dear Lord Jesus took time away from the crowds. But if you are called to home school your perspective must change considerably.

It is essential that the activities of a home school mom must equal the season of a home school mom’s life. It may mean that hobbies (I’m still waiting to begin quilting; so far not enough time.), fun times with friends, even church responsibilities, may need to be put on hold.

Let’s face it, if you are home schooling plus responsibly managing your home and providing for the physical, emotional and spiritual well-being of your husband and children plus maintaining your own personal devotional and Scripture memory time, there really isn’t much time left over. To pursue self interests, something would have to be sacrificed. Again, it would be a matter of ones’ perspective.

I have struggled with this for decades. Jesus said that in order to be His disciple, a follower must every day deny self, take of his cross and follow Him. It is very hard to deny the flesh and the world’s enticements. It is a daily struggle and sometimes these enticements are really good things. But they are not for you; not at this season of your life.

If you are home schooling then you are in a season of your life that doesn’t allow for much else. It is okay. Elisabeth Elliot in Keep a Quiet Heart states:
What I long to help [women] see is that if homemaking and mothering are the tasks God has assigned to them at present, it will be in the glad offering up to Him of those tasks that they will be truly “creative” and find real fulfillment.

Sage advice was offered by Elizabeth Prentiss many years ago:
If you could once make up your mind in the fear of God never to undertake more work of any sort than you can carry on calmly, quietly, without hurry or flurry, and the instant you feel yourself growing nervous and like one out of breath, would stop and take breath, you would find this simple common-sense rule doing for you what no prayers or tears could every accomplish.

I have seen so many wonderful home schooling moms over the past two decades who have simply run themselves ragged trying to do everything. Their perspectives are out of whack.

Paul in his letter to the church at Thessalonica counseled the following:
...aspire to live quietly, and to mind your own business, and to work with your hands...so that you may live properly before outsiders and be dependent on no one.

Dear sisters, you cannot do it all and God has not called you to do it all. If you are a wife, mother, homemaker and parent educator, your plate is full. Stop feeling guilty about the things you cannot do and do the things you must with reverence and gratitude. Maybe now is not the time for your favorite hobbies or fun activities. Soon enough these years will pass and you will move into another season that will allow you more flexibility in your life.

Our dear Lord Jesus through His blessed Holy Spirit will give you all that you need to persevere...and to do so with joy. The more we learn to depend upon God, the greater the peace in our lives. The more we understand that “to everything there is a season and a time to every purpose under heaven”, the greater will be our satisfaction in doing the unknown, sometimes unappreciated, often tedious, responsibilities. There is great joy to be had in being faithful in all things...even the little things.

Thomas a Kempis prayed, “O Lord, how entirely needful is thy grace for me, to begin any good work, to go on with it, and to accomplish it.”

Rejoice in the here and now. Remember that everything that happens is for God’s glory and our good. Enjoy this season of your life.

But the Greatest of These is LOVE

By Gail Biby

If I speak with the tongues of Rosetta Stone Greek, Power-Glide French and A Beka Spanish or a whole host of ivory-tower, ten-dollar theological terms but have not love I am just a noisy school bell or a clanging first-year percussion instrument.

And if I have prophetic powers to envision all my children and grandchildren as doctors, lawyers, devout/diligent mothers, clergy and engineers with six figure incomes…

...and if I understand all mysteries of ‘L’ brain, ‘R’ brain physiology, the doctrine of the Trinity, the miracles of Jesus, attention deficit disorder, or how God Himself could die in my place….

...and if I understand all knowledge regarding complex diagramming of sentences, various end-time eschatologies, algebra’s order of operations (Please Excuse My Dear Aunt Sally), the steps in the scientific method, the differences between the French and American revolutions, all aspects of exegetical, historical, systematic and practical theology, and have memorized all twenty seven amendments to the U.S. Constitution...

...and if I have all faith so that I could move mountains in order to make a place for a larger garden in order to produce all the food my family will need for a year, including growing enough cotton and flax to make my own cloth, but have not love, I am nothing.

If I give away all I have--15-passenger van, expectations for prosperity, store-bought soap, health insurance, television/cell phone/computer, my vacations, every spare minute of every day, my hobbies, health insurance, boat/snowmobile/lake cottage, and my library…

...and if I deliver up my body to be burned or to all sorts of horrors (beatings, shipwrecks, starvation, near drowning, stoning and imprisonment), but have not love, I gain nothing.

Love is patient and kind (even when the children and spouse are not!); love does not envy (even if I can’t afford that guaranteed-to-work-with-ease curriculum; even if my children must wear second-hand clothing); (love) does not boast (even when the children do really well on the standardized achievement tests); it is not arrogant (so what if your little one is already fluent in French and Greek at age 4 and has built his own computer by age 7!) or rude (sometimes what we call honesty is simply discourtesy; you really do not need to weigh in on everything!).

Love does not insist on its own way (there actually are many equally successful ways to home school and some parents have even raised Godly children without homeschooling them at all; God’s people are found in many different denominations; the support group does not need to function as you think it ought); (love) is not irritable (really do you think anyone is interested in your latest snit against your husband?; accidental milk spills at the table are just that; there is a big difference between childish irresponsibility and outright defiance!); love is not resentful (yes, it’s true-no matter how well you may do something or how well your child may do something, there is always someone who can do it better, someone who knows more than you do, someone who succeeds when you don’t); (love) does not rejoice at wrongdoing (this means truly entering into the joy of another’s success!), but rejoices with the truth (after all Jesus IS the way, THE TRUTH, and the life).

Love bears all things (sorrow over a wayward child, death of a spouse, unfaithful friends, separation, financial ruin, disloyalty, even failure);

(love) believes all things (by grace we are saved-it is a completely free gift, Christ will never leave us, God loves us with an everlasting love, we have eternal life);

(love) hopes all things (to one day dwell in the city not made with hands, to worship in the throne room without end, to never, ever sin again),

(love) endures all things (the homeschooling years will be over before you know it and your little ones will be little no more; your home will be silent, the dishes will finally be all clean and in the cupboard at the same time, laundry will be done and put away, grocery bills will be lessened, you can at long last take up quilting).

Love never ends (not ever, not here, not there, not now, not tomorrow, not forever).

As for prophecies, they will pass away, as for tongues, they will cease; as for knowledge, it will pass away (only God’s Word and God Himself will never change).

For we know in part (and we know very little of what there is to know) and we prophesy in part, but when the perfect comes, the partial will pass away.

When I was a child, I spoke like a child (full of foolishness, often silly, seldom wise), I thought like a child (mostly about myself and what I wanted!), I reasoned like a child (coming to wrong and imprudent conclusions).

When I became a man, I gave up childish ways (I began to act in ways pleasing to God, thought of others more than myself, understood the ramifications of unwise behavior, began to understand the blessedness of obedience).

For now we see in a mirror dimly, but then face to face (the thin skin of the world keeps us from seeing the continual activity in the out-of-time dimension, prevents us from knowing God as He really is, keeps us from breathtaking awe). Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I have been fully known (fully known by God, but loved with an everlasting love anyway!).

So now faith (confidence, reliance, assurance), hope (expectation, anticipation) and love (passion, devotion, adoration) abide, these three; but the greatest of these is love.

Alignment of the stars or Providence?

When a lot of good stuff happens to New Agers they give credit to a propitious alignment of the stars or the moon and stars or some such nonsense. (I'm thinking of this because recently Venus was closely aligned with the crescent moon.)

The past month I have been instructed and encouraged by sermons from our Pastor that directly align with what God has been teaching me through other means. It has all the earmarks of Providence and being a Calvinist, of course, I am confident that God DOES work all things together for good.

Pastor has been teaching from the book of Romans and has expertly woven the threads of suffering and joy into one luscious tapestry. I have heard preaching that is ponderous and joyless regarding suffering or angry and depressing and have failed to be either inspired or instructed. But lately through the conjoining of suffering with joy, I have been renewed in spirit. And filled with joy; not at all times (still the flesh to deal with) but a lot of the time.

Proper teaching and acceptance of this (joy in suffering) allows us to realize it is for our good and for God's glory. We are not to refuse the suffering because (it is temporary) our joy is based on Christ's presence not in a life free of pain, loss and suffering.

If I grumble about my lot in life it means I have taken my eyes off HOPE, off the Lord Jesus Christ. I must pray for the grace to respond properly in all situations. Our suffering leads to an inheritance (we are after all heirs with our dear Lord Jesus) and glory. It is absolutely necessary. What do we think the cross-toting life is all about?

This past Sunday the sermon title was "Why Being Weak is a Good Thing" and pricked my conscience. We are to be content in weakness (2 Cor. 12:10); God's power is perfected in weakness (2 Cor. 12:9); weakness makes us totally dependent on our dear Lord Jesus who dwells in us and we in Him. God's indwelling Spirit helps my weakness and prays on my behalf according to the will of God.

How sad for those who think the alignment of planets in some way can bring them either peace or prosperity. I prefer to believe and am confident in the belief that God is truly working all suffering and sorrow for His glory. I am assured from His word that He is with me and will never ever leave me. Believers are now the temple of the Holy Spirit (not physical structures); He meets with me moment by moment and allows me to worship Him wherever I am. Sweet fellowship. Profound joy!

The dear Lord Jesus is the Good Shepherd and He knows how to take care of His sheep, no matter what the alignment of the planets may be!

I don't like it....

Here are some of the things God is trying to teach this stubborn, hard ol' heart and I'm kicking and screaming, begging and pleading, offering and bartering....all the way.

Everything that God allows, or brings, into our lives is to bring glory to Himself and to make us realize that we are totally dependent on Him. TOTALLY! Everything and everyone in this life He can take away or alienate. Bad stuff happens. Death, divorce, abandonment, lies, distrust, heartache known only to God, despair, financial woes, loss of status, and more.

Everything that we consider evil, 'bad luck', harmful, dangerous or untimely will drive us to our knees, sometimes even if we are not willing. God will have His way with us. He is never thwarted by our disobedience. HE IS THE SOVEREIGN.

Even our next breath, our next heartbeat is a gift from God.

Suffering is a privilege. The Scriptures say that we are to enter into Christ's suffering. To refuse to do so is to refuse to acknowledge the joy that is set before us.

In Shadowlands the dying wife, Joy Gresham Lewis, states to C.S. Lewis, "The pain now is part of the joy then." How true.

Though we may kick against the goads, we must not refuse the suffering. Ultimately it leads to great joy.

God knows what He's doing. He can be totally trusted and He will never leave His children...EVER.

Fun, Run, but not Done

Here's a struggle I've had for many years. Maybe you have, too. It's a lot more fun to run around town, state, country (you decide) than it is to work at being done with your duties.

As an adult duty has come to mean a great deal to me. And the thing about duty, true duty, right duty, is that usually these are acts done in secret or at least out of the public eye. Things like clean floors, regularly changed sheets on all the beds, orderly closets, daily journaling, pre-planned meals, mowing the yard, ironing, mending, dusting, window cleaning. All of these are easy to put off if one wants to do something fun!

But if we are admonished by Paul to live quiet lives, to mind our own business and to work with our hands, I guess it ought to be a priority. One cannot do any of these while running to and fro.

Now I understand that some running is necessary. But if we are honest most is just for the fun of it. And we CAN do those fun things, but not until the necessary work to maintain our homes is done.

I probably needed this reminder more than you. I've got quite a list and I'm starting on it today.

Dress for Elderly Ladies

I read the following article this morning and was struck by its truth. Even one generation ago women would never have dressed the way many do now. I mostly wear dresses although pants are a must, in my opinion, in the garden. And I'm not advocating, like the author, that all older women should cast off their sweat pants etc. for a dress. Though one may not agree with everything, it still has some food for thought. And really, aren't you captivated by a well-groomed elderly women not trying to appear 20 years younger or hip?!


(Picture features my mom as a little girl c.1923 with her aunt.)



From http://www.ladiesagainstfeminism.com/
Reader FavoritesFeminine Appearance for Older Women


By Mrs. Stanley Sherman



What has happened to the concept of "growing old gracefully?" You've probably read a lot of "what-is-this-world-coming-to" articles about the unfeminine and immodest appearance of young women, but have you taken a good look at the older women lately? From a distance, most of them cannot be distinguished from old men. The typical "older woman" uniform seems to consist either of combat pants and boots, tee shirts, shaved hair styles, and expensive manicures or jogging suits and/or spandex. Trousers are the least-flattering garment for an older or elderly woman's figure. To make matters worse, most elderly women no longer wear supportive foundations, and their clothing bags and sags, making them look like a jumble of jello. We realize everyone wants to be comfortable, but must it be at the expense of femininity and beauty? And must it be such an eyesore to the public? If women want to be held in high regard in society, the older women must set the example by dressing with dignity. The appearance of our elderly women in modern America is simply awful!Older women have a place in society as wise counselors and examples to the young. They should be showing, by their example and appearance, that life is beautiful and good. Without saying a word, they influence the young, either in a positive or a negative way. One of the reasons women of our century do not look forward to getting older is the bad example of the elderly women they see before them.Older women need to have the kind of appearance and attitude that inspires the younger women to say, "When I get old, I want to be just like her!" If their clothing, hair, and skin are repulsive in appearance, the young women will not be drawn to them. It is true that we are supposed to appreciate the inner beauty of others, but it is also a fact that we live in a physical world with a physical body that must be groomed and taken care of. It is our "equipment for life." If older women have a message to the young, they must first remove the barriers of a slovenly and unflattering appearance.Take, for example, the antiques that we admire. Are they valued and appreciated as much if they are just allowed to sit, uncared for, deteriorating from day to day, without being cleaned or shined? "Shabby Chic" aside, antiques bring us more enjoyment when they are repaired, cared for, restored, painted, and polished. Even a small table with chipped paint looks better when it is graced by a vase of fresh flowers.

As we grow older, our faces may develop wrinkles. One thing older women should know is that shaved, spiked, short, frizzy hair only emphasizes these wrinkles more. Compare such hair styles to the graceful, soft waves of a truly feminine hairstyle. Bangs, or "fringes," make older women look younger, and they hide a multitude of worry lines. Hair dyes that are too dark, such as jet black, are very unnatural looking and make the skin appear more worn out and unhealthy.Hairdressers and so-called fashion consultants are known to tell older women that short hair will give them a kind of face-lift. However, there are some older women who have dared to let their hair grow a little longer, gathering it into a French roll or knot, demonstrating that long hair, when it is upswept, can create an even better face lift. Some of these women say that when they let their hair grow longer, they felt much younger and more optimistic. To achieve a soft, youthful appearance, older women need to stay away from the radical styles of the youth. Knobbly knees and wrinkled thighs are not attractive and only "tell" your age. The best disguise for older women is a beautiful dress! Dresses come in all kinds of shapes and styles and can be used to create visual slenderness and hide figure flaws such as saddlebags, thick waists, and protruding tummies. Appropriate shoes are essential to complete this kind of dressing, and you won't have to worry about comfort. There are very comfortable shoes available that can be worn with dresses without looking like you are off to a sporting event. Older women, do you ever feel depressed about the era we are living in? Do you wonder when it is going to be fashionable and acceptable to wear pretty clothes and hats? In my opinion, older women have to lead the way in restoring true womanhood. We can't expect the young women to develop a sense of dignity and grace if the older women are walking around in sweat pants and windbreakers, looking gender neutral. I feel sorry for young women these days. They haven't got much to look up to in the way of example in dressing, so they mimic the film stars or buy what they see on the rack. There are millions of women over the age of 50 in our society. They don't know the power they could have to change the sorry state of the appearance of modern women. We don't have to have a peer group to give us courage. If only one woman decides to change, it may influence several other women to change. Not long ago, I complimented an older woman I saw in a grocery store. She was wearing a sage green dress with pin-tucks at the bodice. Her pure white hair was secured by a silver clip. I told her how nice she looked and thanked her for helping to make America beautiful. She replied that she used to wear jeans all the time, then one day she decided she wasn't going to do it anymore. Life is too short not to spend your later years dressed beautifully. There just isn't time to wait for it to become popular. Do it now, and leave some lovely photographs for your descendents. Your life isn't over yet; there is a future and a hope for you, too!Young women need to avoid getting into the habit of dressing badly in their youth. The way you dress now will become the way you end up looking as an elderly person. It may seem kind of "cool" to dress in dirty jeans now, but think what it will look like on you when you are old, gray, and wrinkled. It is not a pretty sight! Think carefully what you do as a young person, for that will be how you will end up as an older woman. Get acquainted with clothing and all its aspects now. Learn all you can about dressing appropriately, so that it will be automatic when you are older.

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